My memory is a bit hazy on this but I do remember that I never actually told you I loved you- and at the risk of looking back on this when I'm old and crumbly and possibly dying in my 1-room apartment with the many cats that will eventually eat my body, I'm going to say, that for what it's worth, and for all that's happened between then and now, and for however long it was, I loved you, I think. In Sunday's paper they said something about how loving someone makes you strive for higher things, so as to become someone worthy of their affection, and I guess that makes sense. I felt like I wanted to become someone better, and that I could become someone better with you, so I guess we'll say that it was love. They also say that when you're in love you'll just know, but I don't- though I'll say that being in love and loving someone are two somewhat different things- but it's possible that KI ruined me, so third time lucky: I loved you.